Aliens Vs Predator

Some brief thoughts as I’ve only really just started playing this today and no doubt everyone else in the entire world has blitzed through it already.

Like the films, it’s not nearly as bad as some people have made out. Although yes, I did try the multiplayer at the EG Expo and cried a little tear to myself. I’m not in for the multiplayer though so no worries there.

It has Lance Henriksen in it, which is always a plus.

It’s just a haunted house ride, isn’t it?

Except it doesn’t quite work because there’s no sense of mystery or surprise. From the off you’re told you’re on a planet crawling with aliens and you get the idea that the aliens are nasty who will rip your face off. So, you know you’re not really in for any surprises. Ahar, but you know going into a haunted house that it’s a house that’s haunted, you cry. Well yes, but it’s not knowing what it’s haunted by that’s the real scary thing. Something AvP doesn’t grasp.

As if to hammer this home, your first encounter with the alien is a full frontal expose of the big scary alien. So right, glad we’ve established what we’re up against. And that it’s killed by hot hot pipes by an offscreen character somewhere offscreen. It might be an ugly thing, but it does nothing to set this beast up as anything actually frightening. It appears, it gets killed. In seconds. That’s not scary.

Which is sorta kinda a problem with Aliens in a game as a concept isn’t it? Like Superman being the ultimate super hero, these aliens are supposed to be the ultimate killing machines. They could be anywhere, they’re fucking fast, lethal and they piss acid for blood. So really, you bump into one of these things and it’s game over if you’re a manly marine man. So, that’s the game lasting ten minutes yeah? Oh, we can’t do that? So you have to reduce them to something not scary or something not as insta-death-kill-bringing. Unless…

It’s something both the Mindgames version of Alien and the Electric Dreams take on Aliens played on quite fantastically. In both of these the Alien is the bringer of death in no uncertain terms. You do not want to come face to face with even one of these things. Clearly to make a manshoot FPS, you’re going to have to muck this up a tad but it is doable in a game by one means or another.

Some might argue that “well, that’s how AvP works (or doesn’t, natch) as films too” in not making things as scary for more action packed action or something.

But ok. That wouldn’t matter if the set ups were more burly manshoot game or more action for action packed game. In trying to be scary and a haunted house ride, it falls on its arse because, well, you’ve got big fucking guns. And the aliens aren’t anywhere near as deadly as their movie counterparts. So I’m bigger, badder, more strongified than the aliens that are supposed to be ultimate killing machines. Oh.

Plus, how do you make those face impregnating things scary in a videogame? Instead of “oh shit, they’re going to completely put an alien in my tummy” terror they become more like the rats in Oblivion but without Patrick Stewart making you giggle through awful writing.

And y’know, it keeps doing videogame things. There’s a point where it tells you to put a thingy in another thingy and asks you if it sounds familiar. Clearly meaning “because you did it not ten minutes ago in another room” but my brain screams out “yes, it does, because you fuckers keep making me do these tedious fucking things for no reason in almost every fucking FPS I play”. Which is probably not what they intended.

But really, object A from there placed into object B in here. Please wait whilst object A charges object B for ACTION SCENE is grim.

Extra button close range pushing off stuff can go and die in a fire. PRESS ANOTHER BUTTON TO NOT DIE is shit game design however you look at it. See also, pull lever to kill boss. Pull lever two or three times to kill boss, more so.

It is, however, an incredibly glorious looking game for the most part. So that’s alright then. I’ll play it just to look at the pretties and you wouldn’t believe I’m actually quite enjoying it in a turn your brain off sort of way, would you?